23rd August 2008

Lilac Hues - Pink Attraction - Signs of Having a Girl

Not once in my adult life have I ever had so much attraction to pink or lilac.  Well, I love Lilacs - the flowers - which bloom in the Columbus, Ohio area around Easter, depending on whether it falls early or late in March.  But other than that, not much of one to feel attracted to pink or purple or a lighter version of the latter - lilac.  I had the nursery color picked out - ivory, right?  Or white, with a trace of pink, right?  Sure enough I end up with lilac - the slightest hint of lilac is now on my nursery walls.  What a change from sunset yellow! 

Think Pink - When It's a Girl You're Having!

I walked into Lenscrafters the other day to get some replacement frames for the glasses I rolled over, apparently the new weight is not good for a little pair of glasses - and found myself gravitating towards frames that were deep purple.  When I walked into the doctors’ room to try on a pair of contacts, I found myself seeing only one color in the entire room.  It was the pink in the Method soap dispenser on the countertop.  Tonight, I went to the grocery store and purchased fruit - I noted the pink frosting on the sugar cookies and thought they looked really good.  Was it the pink icing, or was it the cookie?  I think it was the pink - it made me think of having a girl.

Of course, the scary thing - would be - after I’m decorating all in pink - if I was having a boy!  Twice today someone mentioned that they thought it’d be pretty funny if I was going to have a boy.  I said that they should definitely not humor themselves in such a way and try to keep on talking about something else so I don’t get too caught up in this train of thought.  Oh well - that’s what gift receipts are for - at Babiesrus.com, right?  Sigh.  Not something I’m choosing to worry about for now. 

The bigger challenge in my life right now is preparing for Melina from a work perspective as well as coordinating all the other things that will happen in the next couple of months.  I am a problem solver by day, and often even when I try to sleep.  As a search marketing and web analytics analyst, I’m constantly presented with challenges and people’s problems that no one else can figure out.  So, transitioning someone into my position or transitioning out of that position, so I can do something else with  my life - are all part of the plan ahead - for as much as one can plan - there is always fate ahead of you, and destiny perhaps throwing something different to change your path faster than you can blink.  How I transition out of an 11-year plus business role model into something different so I can be okay to step aside and guide another into my position - is something that requires a lot of thought, planning and smart decision making.

It’s only the beginning of the challenges ahead - but I observe many of my esteemed female colleagues doing this often.  They manage, somehow, to handle house manager, baby or child manager, and work manager all in one - some husbands are there 24/7, some aren’t as expected, and yet the women charge on.  Now, not all women I know are like this - sometimes I see the men heading up everything including doing a more than a fair portion of child rearing.  However, some of my closest clients and vendors have become my closest female friends - and I see them lead at home and at the office.  I’ve had the good fortune of being surrounded with strong female leaders in my life whom I have deep respect for at home and at work.  I can only hope to live up to some of that strength as a mother and simultaneously maintain my business relationships, clients, and employee management responsibilities as a manager and business owner.

So despite running a business, and being in charge of so much, at the end of the day, regardless of whether I have worked an 8-hour shift at my office or pulled a 12-hour work day with a few breaks, I come home to my newly designed nursery in the making.  I am attracted to a slight shade of lilac and what it embodies.  I forget about the 12 hour day I’ve just ended, which is surrounded by shades of bold red and goldenrod.  Here, I shut the nursery door, lay down in white and pink pillows, and cover myself with a white eyelet duvet cover with tiny embroidered pink threaded flowers.  I finally fall asleep at  peace, wondering what the days and months ahead will hold for baby girl Melina and I.  I do not think of work - I think of my baby girl.  I think about the crib’s arrival soon, and the little girl’s clothes I’ve picked up as a result of a friend’s baby shower gift.  Somehow, this insomnia I’ve had for months seems to settle - and once I fall asleep, I truly rest with sweet dreams of the little one growing inside of me.

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