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Laura Thieme

Bizresearch President – 11 years - 2008

Fisher College of Business Lecturer on Search Marketing

OSU Russian Studies Grad – 1993

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21st July 2008

Baby Registry, Baby Shower - The Planning Stage - The Fun Stuff 3 replies

Ah - the fun of the second trimester - planning for baby girl - and planning for baby shower - where to register, etc.  I’ve never been one to do much traditional, so what is proper etiquette for a baby shower? 

Baby Shower - It's a Girl!

A close friend of mine who has always wanted to host the baby shower, and plan it, is going through a really difficult time.  I have two other friends who’ve offered to help, although one is far away and it’s not easy for her to get here.

If you plan to do something non-traditional, what’s wrong and what’s right?  Is there a wrong and a right to a baby shower?  I haven’t done much traditional yet, so why start now, in my humble opinion. 

Here’s what I want to do - I want a couple of close friends to throw the baby shower - no surprises - and am thankful that I have two friends offering to do whatever is needed, and even an employee who has offered to help.  At the ripe age of 40, friends are scattered across the country, and in various stages in their lives.  The idea of someone preparing a bunch of food right now does not seem exciting.  So, I was considering a restaurant instead, a fun location, but wondered about proper etiquette.  Can I suggest, hint, the location?  Second, can I ask for everyone to be on their own for a Sunday brunch, cost-wise.  Of course, you’d never ask for a gift, but this is my first baby, so I think it’s figured you are bringing a gift - but in a tight economy, many can not afford to shoulder the cost of fancy gifts, or arrange something like this - so is it okay to ask everyone to do their own thing, financially?  No decorations needed, none of that frilly stuff - just a meal, a drink, and possibly a gift (the latter not stated, however?)

Baby Shower Invitation

 Any baby shower I’ve ever attended included soft drinks, a cake, baby shower games, and some wierd contraption of bows attached to something.  No thanks to the soft drinks, cake, baby shower games and bow contraption, not to mention streamers, etc.- what purpose does that serve?  Can we opt for something like Bon Vie restaurant where the menu includes Eggs Benedict and has a Sunday brunch until 4 p.m.?  We can drink, for those who can or want to, and I’m not talking about soda pop.  I’m talking about the fun stuff.  Is that gauche?  I went to a bridal shower at a restaurant and we bought gifts, and paid our own way. 

Drinking for Fun at Baby Shower

I need baby shower etiquette - and then after it all- suppose I can still do it differently, as long as friends are not offended.  After all, baby shower is for your closest friends who support the baby phase, and thus, would probably not be offended, hopefully. 

Here are some non-traditional concepts on the baby shower - a ceremony of sorts

Miss Manners weighs in on in-laws not throwing a baby shower

Another set of rules on baby shower etiquette - two of which I’ve already  broken - no surprise there

In the meantime, I’m figuring out where to register.

Other non-traditional thoughts in terms of the baby shower:

I love books - and am really looking forward to reading to my daughter at night, rocking her in the chair (today - it’s a “glider”), and reading all the great fables, as well as new ones. 

Is it okay to ask people to bring their favorite children’s book, used is okay too?  In a bad economy, and in the world of eBay and Craig’s List - isn’t gently used okay, if I say it is?  One person offered me something her daughter had - I think that’s wonderful.  Crazy?  Gauche?  Weigh in please!

The New Rocking Chair - the Glider

3 Responses to “Baby Registry, Baby Shower - The Planning Stage - The Fun Stuff”

  1. lilly says:
    July 23rd, 2008 at 6:33 am

    Laura go ahead an register at some fun baby stores near you like babys r us etc and Target cause there are things that folks can chip in and present to you that you will need..cribs ect….best of all most folks will just give you a gift card so you can buy what and when you need things to come…one shower I threw was for a mom of 3 and we all bought her a wallet she liked and loaded it with gift cards to her favorite places..childrens and her stops….like starbucks for the late nights….just an ideal…

  2. Laura Thieme says:
    July 24th, 2008 at 6:27 am

    Did the BabiesR’Us registry two nights ago - lots of fun to do with another mom and daughter! Great ideas, Lilly. I want to catch up and get some more ideas live, via phone, if you’re around tomorrow evening Fri.

  3. Beatrice says:
    July 27th, 2008 at 11:08 pm

    Laura, I think the book idea is wonderful. And if some people want to do more, that is what your registry is for. Let the organizers figure all that out! I think a home is much more comfortable than a restaurant, and without the added complexity of wait staff and menus and bills. It’s possible to do food very simply and easily - esp. if the event is not during a mealtime. I think Melina is a beautiful name. I’ve always loved Malina,too. I’m so happy for you!

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